Denial

An impractical dreamer of dreams
A platonic idealist
A man not susceptible to the general enthusiasm
I alone am in the wrong
An outsider

Nurtured in the deep bowels of malcontent
A dream dreamt on a heavy heart hence sent

Body spent and toiled on taking no heed , quite rightly
For mine divided selves spoke softly of splitting souls and final breath

Pain was but a trial in moral freedom
A cruel extreme endurance lacking spiritual break
To reach upon highest purpose and unconscious spirit

Abed ,in deep slumber is my bodily esse
As self finds no senses to contempt

If only but holy were wills stirred in us
To invoke lights of purpose, of consciousness
ONWARDS !! to guilt , to lies , to life

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Winter tales

I wish to unburden
As I sit, uncertain
Remarks reserved
For these brightened skies
And darkened guise
…………………………………
ALL ABOARD SOLITUDE TRAIN!!
where dreams of lassitude are yours to gain
we promise to go to placid bay
and endure, passive, your every shame

sombre lights tickling sober rights
Wretched wenches infesting societies sights

eyes accustomed to perceptions
Inevitably comfortable with misdirection
By doubtful arrays of conviction
Awakening contradicting fiction

found in the dead cries of words
Transcript in death’s show of verse
The bereft’s guidance
The romantic’s saving of essence
change’s beseeching of adolescence

drooping shoulders of indecision
licking flames of sin
haggard as I walked conquered
in the chilling dismal recesses of mind

Excuse this interlude meant to sooth
Joint at gentle pressures
Demanding and withdrawing
whilst providing ample pleasure

mistakening shivers for sincerity
As eyes wintered all clarity
Reducing polished speech
To remembered absurdity

Exhumed are my wells of woe
Executed were there dreams of hope
Exorcised ; my demons dreaming
Exercised ; i’m dreaming freedom
exemplary, my attempts feeble
Excited about evil’s gleeful

as they place compassion aside
Blurring lines their slurring snides

mirth? HAHAHAHAHAHAAHA
a mere tenant of solicited hearts
Entire solace found worth apart

burning banality
Through Profound performances of posterity
To grow Unseemly and rotund
Repeating shows
Drawn under lines of last entries

Le beau ideal

beauty,created anew
by appreciating stars and shining moon
of assisting winds and lover’s play
with dances new
of dances old
hat atop fair felt view
of hidden sides and focused minds
blinding here and fooling there
it’s grasp as long as breathless song
it shows to us a world foregone
where bygones yawn of gifted sleep
and forgotten waves forget here leek
a voice come speak of blissful kiss
with scarce stirring lips and blessing sigh
she knows not fear and know not tear
this beauty

come anew

here

Silence cried out

Forgive me
You
Forgive me with all the inadequacy of religion to comfort my human heart
Forgive my cry of impotence
blaspheming sincere indifference
to the heavens
May this grief never leave me
If only to reawaken
fearful and faded memory
May it never end , May it forever last
An echo of an echo of an echo

Forgive me my mourning
I fear inevitable forgetfulness
The day at which it saddens me no more to remember
A confession of shameful misery
For a madman’s alms of peace
Deriving faith to comfort love from love
Consoling my sorrow
My lover an enemy rather than a friend
An admirable paroxysm of disorderly selfishness
A Short lived refuge
Who bore my burden
And raised my head

Bygones

Entreat earnestly your fateful hypocrisy as the puppeteer dislocates
Limbs
Strings
Mimicking lives  as you mime disinterest to your senses

Entrusting windy marrows as marooned you are in dimming sunset
To invoke a shiver
Come hither
As it assists in withering wisdom and discontent

Deeming unnecessary your weary mind and worrisome conscious to a world inspired by entropy and the damnation of deliverance

Obscure sorrows enriching reach’s end to the melancholy
As should it be, it is thus
Exempting self of bountiful dream and expectancy

In Hypocrisy’s superseding of practice are dreams slain and wishes forgotten
And there is thy innocence as there is thy essence

Silence caresses the bent backs of lives lived to inspire peaceful commerce hindered by bitterness

Forever spreading lips luscious with publicised hypocrisy of it’s red and love on to cheeks do they rest pale

Blemished is he who believes his deed unblemished. To persist relentless casting shadow upon the chaste.

Martyrdom’s price be love as only lost does it exist. redeeming life of sainthood and ending quest to endure

A hum to thy hearts drum
A lonely lullaby lulling you come

To Suffer Me

– you can choose to be happy.
: but will it choose me?
– depends on your merits
: am I eligible though?
– I would like to think so
: what if I don’t choose it?
– it cancels you off
: wouldn’t that be rather selfish of it
– think of it like a woman
: then is it logical?
– at times it could be inhumanly callous
: it isn’t much of a choice then
– Much like an ongoing lost game
: may I resign?
– don’t speak such blasphemy!
: but is there shame in ” why ”
– at times I found there to be no answer either
: is it hopeless then?
– it is kind. it is unforgiving. It is patient. It is boastful.
: mirror mirror on the wall
– the fairest would surely suffer them all

Pretence

to write of questions
embarking on a farewell voyage across horizons
edges unto which we are to fall
unbeknownst, of hard impenetrable floor to brake it
admit to me as I do to myself that of which you cherish and hold
hidden from even yourself by it’s incoherence to your thoughts
the impossibility of it unattractive
the seeming fiend flexes its confusion causing a tilt of head away
“to more logic”
condemning a term
now commending
clap clap clap
starry eyed, you stare upward
basking in the apparent light as the sun blinds you
such a fanciful caress
of carcass
dead
rotting
and we know, you know
but now, what’s to do
why not do nothing
is it not the imaginable we seek
is it not the unsure we want
is it not that which confirms nothing and drowning in uncertainty we wish to clasp ourselves to and be pulled by it to bottoms of soul as it glitters with bleakness
beckoning us forward to our own destruction
come, for I offer you all
not a risk in sight
not a whim of realism to speak of
and in this state I keep you
to never know
that which fears you
I will give a brother
assurance

Advice

 

-Never revoke with hostility an opinion that differs from your own due to emotional pretense.

-What “they” taught you as a child is supposed to be your base that you go back to later in life.

-Know what to expect before expecting nothing becomes ‘I didn’t think’.

-Freedom , is what you do with what has been done to you.

-No matter how much you stubbornly believe your right;there’s a possibility your wrong.

-Sometimes all it takes is choosing to consider another’s point of view against your own for self growth.

-Misfortune sharpens the wits.To either be flung in an endless loss of agonising and intolerable confusion or simply purity.

-Only in the finality of hope will you find the unknown.

-Forgiving isn’t necessarily forgetting.

-There is no such thing as freedom. Everything has rules you must abide by. The question is ‘reluctance or acceptance”.

-Whoever it is saying anything, always take the good and apply it but be wary of the bad. (Religiously, culturally).

-Whatever point a person has reached in the public eye doesn’t mean they are exempt of fault.

-The real test, is being able to control your temptations.

-To us mortals , it’s how it looks like that matters and not what you meant.

-Go back to who you are as a person before society changed you and adapt your own ethics , code of conduct and behavioural principals. You do yours while they do theirs.

-Be self aware of the impressions your actions form on people. From misunderstandings to wrongful assertions.

-Never forget, ‘safe rather than sorry’. In all you say, do, and think for every unfortunate circumstance could be avoided.

-If everyone that preached virtue was only seen by what vice he has committed, there would be no righteousness in the world.

-The way you feel about something has nothing to do with whether it is true or false.

-Every action is a choice be it consciously or subconsciously.

-Never misinterpret denial of self as weakness for it is undoubtedly strength.

-Smile, for the world will not smile with you.

-Being unhappy is a luxury the poor can not afford.

 

 

 

 

 

Observance

love
as she teased
malicious in midstride
frustrated in disarray
shameful the show
contempt in acceptance
Dreamed up in sleep
watched by all

Distracted

Endured he the procession ,passed time inflicted
Leaden minded ,an eternity of days awaiting
As dreamless he slept and wistful his heart wept
Bearing yesterday , a profound and ponderous echo
For fleeting moments reckoned not love nor leisure
Neither may we suppose to divine measure
Of a soul condemned to resent
Berated popularly, perceived lame
Need not mind he speech of divinity
To wonder aimlessly amongst world’s alive
In dismay he sat to remain

Myself

An absurd contention founded from wounded pride and an array of dashed hopes

Evidently harmless they sew the seed of mortal defiance in a heart willing to live

This heart,possessing ability of love and misery , disheartened and so discouraged from the nativity of a smile

The curve eluded an expression best attributed to a wait at the gallows

As a sense of sin swept across a watchful face awaiting the stroke of fate

Thus was his nature, beseeching change of himself.

Too seek

the seeker saw a passing light

that shown the seeking path

To trod the trail escaping dark

The seer most follow wayward way

 

he tempted feet over heath

foot to follow unwilling foot

With first step he leapt shocked to joy

2nd step ,determined, foot followed show

 

the path seemingly clear but wearer still

For forks approached unknowing fool

Skip to step he journeyed on

Little knew he what was to come

 

time grew

some say passed

but most

little knew

 

brave seeker soon forgot

Grew weaker to what he sought

Trodden sands and forgotten lands

He wished upon wrought

 

to forget all taught

Let all but little rot

Free those I caught

Forgive foes fought

Allow me remember not

 

poor seeker once brave

Paved sorrow along narrowing road

Feet accustomed now

complained how

Decided to sit and wait

 

patience founded reason where action found non

Let’s wait and see

said his heart

have won

 

he pondered and thought

our wandering wondering seeker

Of an end , if an end, was to be got

 

maybe lefts the way

maybe right

maybe I know little

but oh look what a sight

 

twinkling stars gave frame

to moon’s unyielding game

to share the skys

and attract all eyes

but dance and play all the same

 

let’s ly and think why

Thought seeker again

Breathing sighs

and praying goodbyes

 

soon weightless lids grew too heavy

And dreamt he of dreams plenty

to weary and grow bleary no more